I was hell bent on going out, getting into as much trouble as possible and just forgetting the world for a few hours. My bestie Mick was always up for a night out with me, it usually meant free drinks, new friends and adventures only believed by those who were present. We were my neighbourhood, but at a bar I had seldom visited, it was mostly for the bikers and fights were common place with the old bikers taking on the new roadsters but I decided it was the perfect place to disappear from the real world for a while and it had pool tables, a good selection of rock and old school music and the patrons were usually seeking solitude behind their beers and fellow bikers. My friend Mick looked a lot like the drummer from Fleetwood mac, but young and looking almost like he could be my brother. We were both tall and thin and had long, bushy wild hair, his dark and mine red. We usually stood out like two sore thumbs and could never really go anywhere without creating a scene. I burst into the bar with a slight side step and giggle about something the signboard read outside and suddenly the entire bar froze and stared across at us. My barely covers anything mini skirt, low cut back and front shirt, wild hair and cocky attitude caught everyone’s attention. ‘Good evening’ I lacked the self-conscious, awkward thingy that most people have and I always take it as an opportunity to shine under my few seconds of lime light, attention or even just to break the ice. ‘I am in desperate need of my Captain!’ I had barely taken a step forward and the entire bar went back to its usual but with a few extra offers of a ‘Rum en Coke vir die Dame’ and so I began my evening at one end of the bar, restless for a challenge but enjoying the warm up. Being a natural Red, I have grown up hearing everything there is to say about a redhead, Ginger or more locally known, Rooikop. My absolute favourite is “n’ rooikop wat nie naai se hare is gedaai” so was comfortable being called Katvis, Rooikop, Sexy or even Hoender to the select few.
Many Captains and coke later with guys loving my wild hair and foul mouth, commenting about my long legs being wrapped around their necks and many big words but not a real challenge, a few rounds of pool but mostly testing the waters and at last I found him. My pool skills were more focused on bending and showing as much or as little as I choose and my white shirt hid very little of my perky boobs and erect nipples and my new admirer was a large, sturdy looking guy sporting a very well-known bike gang that were known for being the muscle and tough in groups but I preferred them when they are separated from their usual pack and feel they have more to prove with a challenge. I was wearing my favourite leather crotchless thongs under my mini and knew that my admirer was seeing a little more than even he bargained on. By the time I had finished the game, he was now openly leering at me and making little comments that were just out of earshot. I gave Mick that look, heard him mumble something about here it comes, and I leaned onto the bar, looked directly into his dark eyes ‘So Mr big man, all muscle and no talk I see’ I downed my drink, ordered another for myself and mick and proceeded to ignore the glare to my left. I then turned back gave him a good eyeful of my slightly exposed breasts and continued my verbal assault ‘So I hear a lot about you guys, scary boys on their bikes in big gangs but suddenly, when all alone with no support or back up, all talk and no action, or in your case, silent words to yourself and obviously no brain to hold a decent conversation’
‘And your nipples are telling me that you are more than enjoying my glances’ His eyes were glued to my hardened nipples and I gave him my best ‘not impressed’ look and turned back to Mick, who was now mesmerised by our muscle man’s evil death stare and approaching arm. I turned my back on him ‘Hey Mick, this guy is not of the brightest, pointless even trying to converse with him unless it is in grunts’ I knew that this would get our Muscle man all blown up and ready for blood. ‘Hey dude, she is just fucking with you, don’t pay any attention’ Poor mick was now backing up away from the slow approach of angry muscle and then next thing being held against the wall by our muscle man’s fore arm ‘Tell your friend she must watch what she says, she has no idea who I am and what I am capable of’ Mr muscle was now beginning to blow up further with fury and indignation. He was so easy, too easy but fun none the less. ‘Oh right, I see how big and scary you are now’ I was standing my full height in front of him ‘look, so scary he has to hurt my poor innocent friend instead of biting back at me with an intelligent response, which might put me right back in my place’ His hand was holding Mick tight, but not tight enough to hurt or suffocate him at least, it aimed at striking fear into me. ‘Just say sorry for fuck’s sakes and let’s move on’ Mick was getting irritated with both of us. ‘Mr muscle, are you going to kill my brother from another mother, keep holding him up until either you cramp or I get bored or are you going to take me on like a real man’ My eyes were taunting, challenging and dancing with glee at the reaction I was getting from my poor opponent. ‘You guys all focus your energy into your fucking muscles, get all big and scary looking but when it comes to challenges involving intelligence, most of you, fail hopelessly and go and beat some poor teenager up to feel better, it is so damn boring’ I sighed ‘I would like to see more muscles out there with a secret power to outwit and outplay as well as out wrestle, the perfect balance of strength and depth to keep a real woman captive for all eternity’ In typical fashion, he had been focused on my nipples again but quickly looked up with a mumble. I then looked deep inside of his eyes, my eyes reflected true melancholy, a secret yearning for my knight in shining armour’ His eyes flickered and suddenly I saw a man in need of saving a helpless maiden and now released Mick from his grip and turned to order us a round of shots. ‘Let us see if the lady can keep up with the real men then when it comes to shots’ He ordered round after round of tequila and double rums and coke and still I was standing quite strong. My constitution for drinking is legendary and a secret power never revealed, so as the night crept into morning, my strong and brave opponent struggled to maintain his image and was slurring just a little.
Our muscle man eventually dragged himself out the bar, after trying to convince me to go home with him for the hundredth time and Mick and I spent the last few hours downing more rum, hustling the drunk out of money at the pool table and I auctioned my thongs off on our way out the door. ‘Who knew how much those assholes were willing to pay for my thongs’ I had paid a fraction. Mick, however seemed convinced it was more for the show of me on the bar counter, drawing the thongs slowly down my legs with a wicked bend and display of utter glee when tossed to the new owner. I got a standing ovation and a few marriage proposals but Mick made sure we got out of the bar in one piece and this time, was truly pleased we were not in a police van or jail cell again. ‘Let us go fuck up the drive through and demand pancakes so we can go have sex at the water tower and give the early joggers something to inspire them’ Sadly I awoke a few hours later back in my bed, Mick had passed out in the lounge and I went back to sleep unsure if my memories were dreams or if we had really gone out. I then noticed the black leather jacket on the floor near the bed. I stole his Hell’s Angel’s club jacket and could not even remember doing it, poor Mr muscle will have some superb explaining to do. Wish I could be a fly on the wall.
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